Kelly and I have travelled all over together, mostly through Europe and in particular Ireland, where we have ancestral family. We spent last week together with our Swedish friends who spend their summer vacation in Berlin.
Today, for her 50th, we’re on location in a secret destination that is revealed further down the page.
Part I: Secret birthday destination
One of the great things about Kelly is her openness to new experiences, intellectual curiosity and a brilliant mind that enjoys a little mystery in life (or, a lot). So for her milestone birthday, she suggested I surprise her with an onward trip from Berlin, so that we’d be somewhere special and new for her 50th birthday, rather than at home adjusting from jet-lag.
She purchased her ticket into Berlin and out of Frankfurt, so I was able to make the arrangements without her knowing until we arrived at Tegel Airport in Berlin.
The big reveal was a little botched, mostly because we were dropped at the incorrect terminal, but in usual fashion she just went with it and soon her airBaltic boarding pass was in hand.
Given these clues, would you be able to guess the destination?
- A new country for both of us
- Long enough flight to pre-order a breakfast meal
- A connecting flight onward that would last about an hour
- No need for a visa
- A country that uses the Euro as currency
- A different time zone from Berlin, which is standard European
- Same general weather as Berlin
- Not Switzerland (which is where she suggested we go at the beginning.)
Well, my sister is a pretty sharp knife in the drawer, so she narrowed in on a very short list by the time we were at the airport and although the boarding pass was to Riga, Latvia (I kept the connecting coupon), she knew we were connecting and also that I’ve already been to Estonia. So, the big reveal was more like a medium reveal. But still fun.
Are you ready for the surprise….. wait for it….. no really, savor in this moment of uncertainty! Drum roll please…
Vilnius, Lithuania
Part II: A little more about Kelly
I’m into Tarot cards and use them from time to time to inspire thoughts for my day and guide me in periods of change and flux in my life. For Kelly’s birthday I drew the 50th tarot card in my deck and pulled the 6 of Cups or Pleasure, which seems wonderful for a celebratory day. Perfect for Kelly.
The pleasure card, 6 of Cups
Experiencing of pleasure and the giving of pleasure to others.
Emotional nature is being renewed, or regenerated, or emotionally healed.
This is the reward for letting go of disappointment.
The cups on the card are brass, which is the healing metal.
Kelly is a fighter, who’s adult life has been laced with serious health issues, one after the other from the time she was 22. First was non-lymphoma Hodgkins disease and most recently pancreatitis, which can cause random and sudden extreme abdominal pain requiring strong pain medication and/or hospitalization.
Throughout a life of medical procedures, doctors, abundant medicine and the scary unknown of tomorrow, Kelly continues to rise up and move towards healing and renewal. She’s always had a special charisma about her, but in particular seems to channel her pain and disappointment into an amazing power of love and empathy towards others.
She’s miraculously been able to redirect her experiences into ways to provide pleasure and happiness to others around her. From friends and family to a growing brood of nieces and nephews who adore her.
In fact, last night we spent a few hours wandering through the markets of old town Vilnius selecting just the right souvenirs for each of the 9 small children waiting at home in Oregon. The best color for the t-shirt for Emily, the perfect soccer jersey for Will. Bringing pleasure to others is always on her mind, and it shows by the vast network of loved ones around her.
Part III: Healing through travel
Kelly and I seem to have an ongoing theme around travel and healing. The year I was studying aboard in Salzburg she went through radiation and then chemo for non-lymphoma Hodgkins disease and completed her treatment just as I was ending my study abroad. She flew over and met me and we traveled together for about a month from Ireland to Paris to Sweden, ending up in Austria.
A sensible shake for dinner
On this particular trip we enjoyed begin the youngest participants by 40 years on a Globus Tour of Ireland, the honorary grandchildren as several called us. Kelly also wasn’t able to eat solid food as a result of her radiation treatment, so we (I) carried around a completely separate suitcase with her astronaut food, which she’d make into delicious shakes to eat at every meal.
As the trip progressed, however, her spirit became stronger and I believe the healing nature of experiencing new people and places was a bright light and she quickly began eating simple solid foods. After all, it just not fair to go to Ireland and not eat a potato!
Optimistic resolve to forge ahead
Despite continued medical issues, Kelly does not accept defeat and keeps on keeping on with travel and experiencing life with the many loved ones around her. When her kidneys stopped functioning due to a very obscure auto-immune disease and she was on dialysis, we still had our family vacation in Hawaii. She figured out a way to go to the one dialysis center on the Big Island of Hawaii at the needed intervals.
Today, although she suffers from Pancreatitis, which flares up at any time and can require a hospital stay, she forges ahead with bravery and continues to see the world, and experience the joys associated with travel and in particular visiting friends and family.
And the travel seems to be an added shot in the arm, to heal her and keep the Pancreatitis at bay enough to allow for enjoyable experiences; hearty laughs with life long friends and quirky walking tours of any city. In particular, she really digs ghost tours. Don’t ask her about the gravediggers tour in Dublin though – that one was a complete miss!
It isn’t all roses
Travel with a chronic disease is tough and scary at times. She requires a lot of sleep, sometimes 16 hours a day and has to understand proper limits to the energy output over the course of a trip. When we travel together, although it can be frustrating at times, I work hard to understand these limits and find ways to do my own exploring during her times of needed rest.
I can’t begin to imagine a life with ongoing medical issues and the feeling of disappointment that would bring, especially for one who enjoys travel. This fear might have others just stay home and hibernate so I admire Kelly’s strength to keep going and continue to work to heal along the way.
So when we travel, I get to experience first hand the brilliant light of love, empathy, humor and a special brand of charisma that draws people to her.
Kelly inspires me to be open to new experiences, go with the flow, not get hung up on particular outcomes and to think about others and ways to bring them joy. This in my travels and daily life at home.
So, on this special day, I offer thanks to my sister for her love, empathy, intellectual curiosity and humor that makes traveling with her so much fun.